Can I ask you a Question?"
By: Jonathan Wright, Executive Officer, [PC]
Patia Zoei, Chief Counselor, [PC]

Stardate: 58205.11 1100

Commander Wright decided he was going to enjoy a holonovel, however, to do that properly he needed to be dressed for the part and for that he needed to go shopping, well sort of. The replicators in the crew living quarters worked fine for food and dishes but were not big enough for clothing and other larger items. The ship had much larger replicators located throughout the ship for the crew to use for clothing, gifts and other such items.

Wright signed onto one of these replicators. He intended to play the role of Dirk Pitt from a novel by an author named Clive Cussler. Fortunately the ships computer kept a library of all of the holonovels installed on the ship and could replicate clothing to fit any part in the story. Wright was looking though the catalog when Counselor Zoei walked in.

"Hello Counselor," greeted Wright.

"Hello, Commander," Patia smiled slightly. "How are you?"

"I'm doing well. How about you?"

"I am doing well, also, thank you. I heard a rumor my brother and his family has been station on Qul Tuq. Before we return, I wanted to have gifts for my niece and nephews. Since I had some spare time, I thought I would browse what was available." Patia shifted sligtly from one foot to the other. From what she had heard, Commander Wright was probably the person on board who had the closest relationship with Silvio. She wondered what, if anything, Silvio had told him.

"Now that our Klingon XO has taken my job away from me I get a little down time. I am going to take in a holonovel. I am just looking for the proper attire," said Wright "I think I will take Lieutenant SIlvio along as my sidekick. Every action hero needs a sidekick." Wright laughed. "There are a lot of nice gifts in here. I am sure you will have no trouble finding them something for them."

"I am sure the perfect gift will be here. The question is, will I find it," Patia chuckled. "They are twelve now, which is a bit of a challenge for an old, maiden aunt with no children of her own. Which holonovel are you going to take in?"

"I have not decided yet. I am going to select one based on a series of novels by a man named Clive Cussler. Just not sure which one yet."

"So you will be Pitt and Silvio will be Giordino?" Patia asked.

Wright smiled at Zoei, "You are familliar with Cussler's novels?" Wright was surprised that thre was another person on teh ship familliar with them.

Patia smiled slightly. "I grew up on Earth, I have an older brother who thinks he is invincible, yup, I am familiar. I prefer the Dirk Pitt novels over the Kurt Austin ones, too. My favorite is Raise the Titanic."

Wright nodded. "Yes, that was a good one."

"I had a question for you, if you don't mind. It is a personal one, though." Patia paused, hesitation evident on her face.

"Sure,: said Wright as he looked around the room. People were starting to come in and out of the room. "Let's go somewhere else though," he suggested.

"That would be a good idea," Patia nodded. The last thing she needed was rumors flying. As a counselor, it was important she was circumspect with her own life so others could feel comfortable with her discretion.

Wright led Patia to a turbolift. "Arboretum," said Wright as they got onto the lift. When they gotout they were standing in a good sized room with a few trees and benches. It was clear that the arboretum was not finished. "This is the arboretum. It was not finished during ship constuction so no one ever comes here. What is on your mind?"

"It is a personal question, about your relationship with your wife. Rather," Patia's features contorted slightly, "rather, how your relationship started. I am fumbling this badly. What I am really curious is what it was like for you, when your partner is capable of touch telepathy."

"That is a very interesting question," Wright paused, thinking back. "At the time her telepathic abilities did not matter that much to me. I knew she had them but aside from that I never game them much thought." Wright again stopped talking as his mind wandered back in time. After we were married, she bonded with me. That opened my eyes to the whole thing. It was both the greatest gift she ever gave me and the worst." Wright looked at Zoei and asked , "What do you ask?"

"I am curious about how a relationship works between when one has empathic or telepathic abilities and one does not. I know of no other person I can ask these questions. If they are too personal, I would understand." Patia was nervous enough about asking these questions.

"No, it is alright. I do not mind." Wright smiled. "I enjoy talking about T'Pril." Wright wondered why the counselor was so curious on this subject. He was not sure he would be if much help to her. "Her telepathic abilities I would say enhanced our relationship. A part of her was always with me until she died. I would not have traded that experience for anything. I do wish that I could have been a little more prepaired for what happened when she died. It took me a long time to deal with her loss."

"Do you mean the vacancy you felt when she died?" Patia asked.

"Yes, this might sound a bit selfish but I grew accustomed to having her with me. When she died that was gone. It grieved for her physical loss and also for the loss of the bond that we shared." Wright paused and sat down on a bench. "I did not expect that."

Patia nodded. "I have lived with that feeling so long, I have forgotten what it was like before I had it. Would you ever consider a relationship with another person? Would you be willing to have a relationship with someone you couldn't be bonded to, at least not the way you were with T'Pril?"

Wright thought about that for a moment. "I will never say never, however, right now, I have to say that I do not plan on having any more relationships, at least not intimate ones." Wright looked a Patia, "That is just my preference. Your situation is all together different than mine. Is there someone you are considering a relationship with?"

"Let's just say someone has expressed an interest. After Lucio died, I never decided I would never have another relationship, but as time goes on, you become accustomed to being alone. Even if you say to yourself you are not opposed to having a relationship, you can't visualize yourself as half of a partnership. Your scope of thought never includes another person, be it partner or children, or a partner's family. To have that thought shaken is a frightening thing, I have to say." Patia walked toward a bench. Her fingers rubbed the rough wood back as she looked up into the tree overhead.

"Indeed it is," said Wright. "Do you want to have a relationship with this person?"

"If I were to be interested in a relationship, this person is someone that would interest me. This person also says he understands, but if you haven't been there, I don't think you can truly understand the type of relationship I had with Lucio. How do you explain to someone that you had a piece of them inside you, and a piece of you inside them, when it isn't something most people have any frame of reference for?" Rythmically, Patia rubber her fingers up and down the bench. "Well, you know, he probably thinks he understands but I do agree with you. There is no way he could. " Right looked at Patia. "Does it really matter? When it is all said and done, the bond you had with Lucio is yours and always will be. He doesn't really need to understand it he just needs to accept it."

"That is a very good point. This also would have the potential to be very final for me, and that is probably where most of my hesitation lies. Final isn't a bad thing, necessarily, but this person is a human. There wouldn't be the empathic side of the relationship there. I have known for many years I would never be able to have that type of relationship with another person from Betazed, but maybe I have just been in denial. We were both children, but I liked that connection. I liked feeling his emotions and knowing he would feel mine, someday at least if not right then. That won't happen. It is not a comment about the unsuitability of the person, but it is an acknowledgment of, what is really going to amount to another loss for me. I can't explain this well. It is about culture and cultural expectations. It probably doesn't even matter in the long run, but it is going to be a process for me. I guess the good thing is I can recognize that now."

"Are you saying that you would not desire to have a bond with this person or that you do not think it is possible to have one because he is human?"

"It is not possible to have a bond with a human in the same way you can have a bond with another from Betazed. I am not saying it is impossible to bond, it is different."

"I am sure it would be different. Who knows? It could be a even better experience. I think it is best that you worry about that when the time comes counselor. Live for the moment and take these things one day at a time. They will work themselves out." Wright offered Zoei a smile.

Zoei returned the smile, with gritted teeth. "Sir, this is not your problem, but believe me, that is easier said than done. I appreciate you taking the time to answer those questions, though. I was out of line asking them."

Wright noted that Zoei had tensed. "You are not out of line counselor. My door is always open if you have more questions."

"It is appreciated, Sir. I will let you get back to your holonovel preparation. Say hello to Clive for me when he makes his appearance." The corners of Zoei's lips tipped upward very slightly.

"My pleasure counselor," said Wright. "Have a good afternoon."

"You as well, Sir." Patia turned quickly and walked toward the turbo lift. Her back was ramrod straight, but her head hung slightly.

Wright pondered the identity of the mysterious human who has cause such tirmoil in the counselor but only for a moment. He had a holonovel to get ready for.