Shakedown #144"
By: Patia Zoei, Chief Counselor, [PC]

Stardate: 58203.01 0955

Counselor’s office

Patia sat up slowly. Five minutes had passed since Ensign Favor had left her office. They had been the longest five minutes of her recent memory. Her feet felt like lead weights as she shifted them from the coffee table to the floor. Shakily, Patia stood. She stumbled, brushing against the coffee table. Her mug, half filled with cold coffee, tipped over and rolled to the edge of the table. The pool of coffee left in its wake had the fogged, stale appearance of drinks better left alone the next time. Patia clumsily grabbed a handful of tissues and sopped up the mess. As she put the used tissues in the waste receptacle, her shaking increased. This is why she avoided getting emotionally entangled in anything. As long as it was someone else’s emotions she was fine, but reach her innermost self, and it just wasn’t an easy task putting herself back together.

Patia returned to her desk. Her PADD was still sitting out, ready for the next bit of work to be completed. She eased into her chair and took several deep breaths. She was more under control than she had been right after the Ensign left, but she wasn’t ready to return to her tasks yet.

“Computer, begin correspondence, addressed to Liesa Zoei, Betazid.

Dear Mother,

I was thinking of you today. If you can imagine this, I, Patia Zoei, lost control today. I knew you would have a hard time believing it. Someone was in my office, not in session, but stopping by. She told me I was like a mirror and I have walls up so I share nothing with other people. After the emotional stress of this week, that was just too much. I actually told her about Lucio. In twelve years of schooling and four years of service, I have mentioned this to no one, not one single person. You are the one that started it, too. She stopped to tell me she recognized the scent I wear. It is the same one her mother wore.

Anyway, life is settling in here. We are out on a test drive of the USS Zion, so to speak. We are due back at Qul Tuq before too long. The crew will take a little R & R. It will be awhile before I will be able to take an extended leave and come home.

Please give my love to Daddy and Michelio.

All my love,

Patia

Patia reviewed the letter to her mother. What was her purpose in sending this letter? Would it really make her feel better? Now that she thought of it, she was feeling better already. A different letter, a different day would be in everyone’s best interest. Someday she was sure she would understand the significance of it, but for some reason, her mother was almost touchier about Lucio than she was.

“Computer, erase correspondence,” Zoei stated.

She picked up her PADD. There was a memo to send to the Captain and an appointment with the Doctor she saw. The day was busier than she had anticipated this morning when she came in. Time to get back to work.